Italian Injustice

So I just finished a new book and I should've seen this coming. After losing sleep - either by being held captive, unable to stop reading, or by choosing to reading a true murder story right before bed - I've finally finished Waiting to Be Heard by Amanda Knox.

I don't know where I was when this worldwide sensation of a trial was happening. Both Italian and American medias apparently fed on this thing like parasites. Guess I didn't care much for current events in my sophomore year of college. Anyway, I'm more than caught up now and I'm obsessed. I didn't want the story to end. I have a pile of books on deck just waiting to be read, but I'm literally taking a grace period just to let Amanda's story marinate. It keeps running through my head. I got five hours of sleep last night after a marathon of her YouTube interviews, and I don't regret a thing.

This girl was steamrolled. I genuinely can't imagine being in her shoes. The absurdity of her trial sounds like it can't possibly have happened in real life. I understand that, being an autobiography, this book is the definition of biased. However, I feel 100% confident that this girl didn't kill anyone. There's no evidence whatsoever proving what Amanda was indicted for, and the antics the prosecution pulled (and got AWAY with) are insane.

I now present you with a short manuscript meant to truncate the 4 year trial into its most basic, ridiculous form and smother it with as much mockery as possible. Almost no exaggeration necessary.

Prosecutor: Amanda, can you tell us what you were doing in Italy?

Amanda: I was so excited to be studying abroad! I grew up in Seattle but have always loved the Italian language, so I thought a trip overseas would be the perfect way to push my limits and jump out of my comfort zone in a beautiful foreign country!

Prosecutor: Cool, so why'd you kill your roommate then?

Amanda: What?! I didn't. I wasn't there that night. I was at my boyfriend's place. We ate dinner, watched a movie... I never left the apartment.

Prosecutor: Oh, you left.

Amanda: What? No, I said I didn't leave all night.

Prosecutor: Okay, you did though. Who was with you when you murdered Meredith?

Amanda: I didn't!!

Prosecutor: Yessss.......?

Amanda: No!

Prosecutor: But yes?

Amanda: No! I was never there. I have no idea what happened or who killed her.

Prosecutor: Cool, so you were there. Mark that on the record. Was it your boss Patrick that killed her with you?

Amanda: What?! No!

Prosecutor: Okay, so you and Patrick killed her. Perfect. Who else is guilty - your boyfriend? Yeah, yeah, he was there too.

Amanda: This is ludicrous.

Prosecutor: So you met up with Patrick that night. Yes? Patrick came with you, say it. Patrick. Patrick was there, come on... confess. Patrick? Patrick. Patrick. Patrick? Patrick and you. Killers. Patrick, yes? PATRICK! Patriiiiiiiii - (42 hours of interrogation later) - iiiiiiiick!!!!!

Amanda: Fine! God, shut up! I guess it might've been him....?

Prosecutor: A ha! Sign this.

Amanda: Wait!! I don't know why I said that. None of us were there. I have an alibi.

Prosecutor: No one cares. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.....


PRE-TRIAL

Amanda: I didn't do it. Don't know anything. I wasn't there.

Judge: Likely story. Jail immediately.


TRIAL

Prosecutor: Amanda's a she-devil, a real ho bag. She's sadistic and violent and sexually deviant and loves to kill people for fun.

Jury: Mmm hmm. Yep.

Prosecutor: She and her buddies killed Meredith.

Jury: Sounds like fact to us.

Prosecutor: This is the knife she used. I was looking through the drawer of the person I was trying to accuse & found a random knife in a pile of other kitchen knives. I feel like it's probably the one...  It's pretty sharp and could probably kill someone, so it killed Meredith. Irrefutable.

Jury: Yep, yep. We're with ya.

Prosecutor: Also she just looks like she probably did it. So....

Jury: Right. So she did.


CROSS EXAMINATION

Forensic Detective (Prosecutor's Witness): There's Amanda's DNA on the blade, too.

Defense: Oh, really? Can we see the tests that show that?

FD: Uhhhh.... my dog ate it.

Judge & Jury: Good enough for us. Aw... dogs are cute!

Defense: Did you do your job correctly, following protocol every step of the way?

FD: Of course.

Defense: So you didn't interrogate Amanda for 4 days, slap her, threaten her family, use leading questions, and neglect to read her her rights?

FD: Well....

Defense: You didn't wait weeks before thoroughly investigating the crime scene's DNA, move things around, test levels of DNA that are legally-speaking invalid, and use the same dirty gloves to contaminate every piece of evidence you touched?

FD: Uh.....

Defense: You didn't disregard and cover up multiple declarations of innocence by Amanda? You didn't then make up stories from your imagination that perfectly fit your theories and leak them to the press as fact?

FD: I mean......

Defense: You said some other guy's DNA was all over Meredith's body, room, house and belongings. And that his handprint and footprint made in her blood were found in the bedroom.

FD: Yeah.

Defense: Did you find ANY microscopic scrap of Amanda's DNA anywhere near Meredith or the crime scene?

FD: She probably washed it off before we got there.

Defense: So not only could she see the DNA with the naked eye, but she could discriminate between hers and this other guy's. Then she used her magic disappearing ink to get rid of only hers.

FD: Uhhhh. Well, we found her DNA in the bathroom they shared!!

Defense: Right. Seeing as though they SHARED the bathroom.

FD: Stop making sense. She killed her; everyone knows it.


CLOSING STATEMENTS

Defense: She didn't do it cause there's literally NO credible evidence or witnesses to speak of.

Prosecutor: She did it. We just have a feeling about this one.

Jury: Okay, 26 years in prison.

Thank God after 4 years of unjust imprisonment, Amanda won her appeal case and finally went home. All of their evidence was deemed invalid and improperly analyzed. Good riddance, ya stupid Italian judicial system. Basically they had an unbiased, actually-intelligent team of outside investigators come in and analyze the way all the evidence was collected in the first place. Turns out the prosecution team are a bunch of persuasive apes who had the media, and consequently the public, wrapped around their finger.