Gotta Have Some TLC

One of my guilty pleasures is television. And you might be saying, "That's not a guilty pleasure. Everyone loves TV! You idiot." First of all, watch your tone. Secondly, I would agree for the most part. The vast majority of the U.S. population could name more members of Jersey Shore than of President Obama's administration. But I can't say I don't feel slightly guilty (or lazy) when a TV reference comes up in conversation and I hear someone go, "Oh, I don't own a television. But I did finish three novels this week in between Habitat for Humanity projects." At which point, I usually stew in self-pity for a few seconds, then remember Parks and Recreation is on in three minutes and park it in front of the nearest TV with a Wawa shortie.

Recently though, I've been addicted to TLC. Every time I turn it on, whatever I was doing is put on the back burner. It's the ultimate procrastination station, which makes me think TLC probably stands for Too Little Completed. I blame Discovery for putting four of the most addictive shows ever on one channel. Alright, maybe not addictive... but you can't say you don't get sucked in, too.

What Not To Wear -  When I'm in a fashion dilemma, all I need to ask myself is WWSCD (What Would Stacy and Clinton Do?) They literally have all the answers. And they're funny as hell. I never get tired of watching them do their magic. Step 1: Ambush some middle-aged cat lady on the street and force her to watch hideous footage of herself. Step 2: Throw out her entire collection of polyester jackets, wool turtlenecks and pleated tapered pants. Step 3: Drop her off at the nearest H&M and watch her kick and scream about having to spend $5000 on anything she wants. Step 4: Return everything she bought. Buy her the wardrobe of Jennifer Aniston. Step 5: Cut her hair against her wishes, show her a makeup regimen she'll never use again, and show her off like a pageant queen. I'm telling you... whoever came up with this formula is a genius. I've learned a lot in between Stacy and Clinton's sarcastic remarks and singular conversations ("You can pair a great neutral pant with a classy wedge and a three-quarter sleeve.")

19 Kids and Counting - I'm torn between judgement and acceptance. Let's take a look at the arguments: Did one woman deliver 19 babies? Indeed, she did. However, they're all freakishly healthy and genetically perfect. Does this woman teach her kids that evolution doesn't exist and dinosaurs rode in on Noah's Ark? ......Yes. But these kids are as grateful, polite, kind-hearted and well-behaved as baby Jesus himself. So I say the lesson here, as in Sister Wives, is to look past the differences in belief and lifestyle, and see people as they are. Who am I to judge how people live their life? If you can find a way to financially support a family of 21 and build a giant house from the ground up, more power to ya. And to you, Sister Wives, I raise my glass. I have not the faintest idea why you've decided to share your husband with a handful of other chicks, but you know what? You do it. Everyone deserves to be happy!

Little People, Big World - Okay, let's get serious here. While this show's concept is entertaining - a couple of hard-working little people running an Oregon farm - the main reason why I tune in is the oldest and tallest member of the family, Jeremy. I know I'm a cradle robber and I'll never meet him, but he's gorgeous and that's all there is to it. Just one more reason to justify gluing my eyes to the TV screen.