I Need Earmuffs

Has anyone heard what's on the radio recently? I have two little sisters - 11 years old - and the lyrics that are floating into their ears and coming out of their mouths are bananas. It's got me thinking about what kind of music I was raised on. Love has always been a theme, but either I was too naive (absolutely true) or the top 40 really weren't that scandalous.

We'll be hanging out now and my sister will start spouting off the latest trashy pop hit. Not that "Sexy and I Know It" isn't appropriate for the family dinner table....

Just for a little retrospective, here's a sample through the decades:

Someday when I'm awfully low
When the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
and the way you look tonight   
- Frank Sinatra, 1964

Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
In good times, in bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
Oh, that's what friends are for   
- Dionne Warwick, 1986

Mmm bop, ba duba dop
Ba doo bop, duba dop ba
Doo bop, ba duba dop, ba doo
Yeah yeah                                
- Hanson, 1997

Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy
Grab my glasses, I'm out the door, I'm gonna hit this city
Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
'Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't coming back
I'm talking pedicure on our toes, toes
Trying on all our clothes, clothes
Boys blowing up our phones, phones
Drop-topping, playing our favorite CDs
Pulling up to the parties
Trying to get a little bit tipsy
- Ke$ha with a dollar sign, 2009


To be honest, Ke$ha's lyrics really aren't a fair representation of our current era of music. No, the rest is much worse. Don't make me pull out Chris Brown or some Kanye. If it isn't explicit sexual lyrics, it's some Auto-Tuned pop song from a girl wearing too much glitter and not enough bra. At least music videos have all but disappeared from MTV or else my Granny would be getting an eyeful and an earful.

Growing up, the worst I remember hearing was like "2 Become 1" by the Spice Girls. (Blissfully unaware of what was going on there.) At 11 years old, I was innocently dancing around my living room singing "Bye Bye Bye" into a hairbrush. Now I really think I need to just pop some earmuffs on my sisters until they turn 18. It's the only way. Thank God for the Taylor Swifts and the Adeles of the world.